Scarlet and Bursts The Sunday Whirl #11

 

 

 

A ruinous siren flies
on floss-flecked limbs,
dagger tucked
´neath scarlet sash …
tossing mirth in fading day;
hurtling bursts clear waves,
reaching the fresh solar shore;
she turns her gaze toward
innocence as solemn music fades

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32 responses to “Scarlet and Bursts The Sunday Whirl #11

  1. spooky, feels like a science fiction landscape

  2. I like “floss flecked” limbs, and agree with janet….I can picture the siren as an anime’ character. Well constructed, Pamela.

  3. I also liked the siren, as well as the phrase, “she turns her gaze towards innocence.” Lovely – and surprisingly compact – use of the Wordle. Congrats!

    Thx also for the address thing. I think WordPress grabbed the Gravatar and made that your link. Odd, three people had the same problem… Here’s my Sunday Scribbling… Thanks! Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/07/03/hitch-in-praise-of-alfred-hitchcock/

  4. Like your unusual imagery and how you worked these words. I saw her. You drew a very distinct portrait. Really like that last line,

    Elizabeth
    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2011/07/03/survival/

  5. My reaction was the same as Lucychili. A fine poem that repays several readings.

  6. A ruinous siren? wow. I really like the portrait of her.

  7. I agreen with Irene. You described this siren and her work well!

  8. Very scifi/fantasy – I enjoyed reading this one. I could see her as the antagonist in a movie or novel.

  9. I too like ‘flies on floss-flecked limbs’. People have had to be particularly creative with the word floss, so it’s fun to see it in all its incarnations. I like it when a poem wrestles me to the ground. The results are always fun to see.

    margo

  10. Exotic imagery. I agree with the others it has a science fiction/fantasy feel.

  11. Cool site, Pamela. I have just finished moving. Please note my new email address – WildWoman2@shaw.ca 🙂

  12. Got it, Sherry and thanks.

  13. A very striking scene… I can only imagine how innocence fared up against such a daunting gaze.

  14. Francis, the other half of her story remains to be written 🙂

  15. Nicely done, Pamela! I love floss-flecked limbs. I have not managed to work floss into my wordle poem yet.

  16. Very dark and menacing and, who is the innocent?
    Loved the use of the wordle words. A good read, thanks. 🙂

  17. I like the open-ended story. Our girl’s a pirate-siren, and she’s fun.

  18. This poem has so much movement at the beginning, and I love how it decrescendos with the fantastic last two lines.

I appreciate all comments.

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