“She” The Sunday Whirl #50

She whispers a crocus song,
residing on a porcelain porch,
shining with fragrant roses tending
imaginary wishes; bleeding
petal-scent enters her world …

soft-string collections
inundate smell

She pets morning clouds to
shape days of unvisited
Krishna temples

She rests with a cat’s paw
in her lap, reciting song-filled
tricks of tomorrow

Cherries pick moments
packed away, longing for
taste of a sweet elsewhere,

pointing to subtle remembrance

Process notes: I found these words particularly challenging this time. I kept seeing a woman who was lonely, and possibly unsure of the faith in herself and those around her. I am also counting this as the day one poem of napowrimo. I am going to try to write a poem a day, using some of Margo’s and Joseph’s neglected prompts as springboards. I am hopeful, but not sure I will make it through the month. I am on a two week vacation, after that my crazy life will begin again. Happy NAPO to all!

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23 responses to ““She” The Sunday Whirl #50

  1. She pets morning clouds… I love that. This whole piece is amazing. Best of luck to you this month and enjoy your vacation!

    http://lkharris-kolp.blogspot.com/2012/04/april-national-poetry-month.html

  2. I enjoyed this stanza:

    Cherries pick moments
    packed away, longing for
    taste of a sweet elsewhere

    Interesting to think of cherries picking the moments instead of being picked themselves. What clever wording, Pamela.

    Glad you are doing NaPoWriMo. Me too. Using whichever prompts seem to speak to me. I used my wordle as day 1 as well!

  3. I love the first two lines, Pamela. They set a gentle almost fragile tone to the piece.

  4. Song-filled tricks of tomorrow. As if she is maybe, trying to convince herself, tomorrow is going to be a better one than today. Lovely, gentle, with a hint of sadness.
    Good luck with the one a day per month. I don’t think I could cope with that kind of pressure 🙂

  5. Bren, I am hopeful, but that doesn’t mean I will accomplish 30 in 30 days. Once I return to work things won’t be so easy. Thanks for the insightful comment.

  6. She’s lonely, lovely and poetic.

  7. Gorgeous writing, Pamela! “She whispers a crocus song” is lovely. I also loved “she pets morning clouds.” How very magical. I am glad you are a part of NaPo!

  8. “This piece is quite drafty to me. I had an extremely hard time with the words”. And yet despite that you illuminate for us a woman not desperate but fragile somehow. (as others have said) “Residing on a porcelain porch ..” She is placed in fragile circumstances and her longings give away her thoughts of feeling just a bit confined. I love this piece.

  9. This is sweet with longing. You’re poeming during your vacation? *hugs*

  10. Pamela, I know you said you had a hard time with these words, but there is a delicateness to your images – the “porcelain porch” and “She pets morning clouds” – that I enjoyed.

    Richard

  11. Richard, these words didn’t want to cooperate with me at all. I kept coming up with cliches bouncing off the walls. Thanks for the nice comment.

  12. I think we can all feel like your Lady-friend at times. Uncertainty being as consistent as change. You could almost read ‘morning clouds’ as ‘mourning clouds.’ A delicate touch with this weeks wordle. I enjoyed it very much.

  13. Pamela – your process notes helped me here. I don’t know if it is the plethora of poetry (already in just 2 days of NaPoWriMo) or my lack of focus…but after reading your process notes and having that image in my mind as I read….INCREDIBLE. I felt the wistful loneliness of tending to imaginary wishes. Beautiful.
    ~Paula

  14. Paula, I feel that way on most days :). Thanks for the nice comment.

  15. Sometimes our best work comes from our greatest struggles. This poem is beautifully delicate and poignant, Pamela.

    In some ways, it reminded me of both my grandmothers – one long past and the other one not too much longer for this world. For them both, the porcelain porch was a body no longer strong enough to support their former daily activities.

    Neither had a cat, but I can imagine them sitting with the metaphorical cat of their memories, petting it and wishing it (and they) were a kitten once again.

I appreciate all comments.

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