One Last Dance The Sunday Whirl # 51

Destiny walked on,
my marrow turning Flamenco
songs into broken static,
staggering on a brink

You lost remembering,
leaving themes behind
as stories go …

Mated in broadside
addiction, buried deep
within a ribcage of
bloodless sorrow,

braided in long strands,
dusk finally arrived

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27 responses to “One Last Dance The Sunday Whirl # 51

  1. Dusk is a finality and thus ends a yearning or a relationship through time and space. Feelings gambled and fondness lost, a human tragedy again. Great write Pam!

    Hank

  2. This is truly, wonderfully penned. A great, beautiful read 🙂

  3. Dusk always arrives, as does sunrise. I just loved the first stanza. Well wordled throughout. Happy Easter, Pamela!

  4. The second stanza adds sadness… It evokes the memory loss addiction brings, but also the memory loss of dementia. Perhaps there is some similarity. That fabulous last couplet speaks to both themes, as well.

    • Brenda, I was listening to the university radio station yesterday, and they were playing some awesome gypsy Flamenco songs. I combined that with my own history of having had a family member with an addiction some years ago. And here is the end result. Thank you for the nice comment.

  5. Addiction is a dreadful thing. Anyone who can beat one has climbed out of the pits of hell.
    Lovely piece Pamela.

  6. I thought you were going to beat the list into submission when Flamenco caught my eye. Instead, you turned depressing into good

  7. poetry. Sorry. my connection keeps cutting out.

  8. Wow…well done. I love this stanza:
    Mated in broadside
    addiction, buried deep
    within a ribcage of
    bloodless sorrow

    … and the ending is perfect.

  9. You keep hitting home runs, Pamela! This is a stunner! I loved: “my marrow turning Flamenco” and “Mated in broadside
    addiction, buried deep within a ribcage of bloodless sorrow,” WOW! And your last line is perfect! Whatever you are doing, keep doing it. Your writing is amazing!

  10. I am *blushing*, Marianne. What a delightful thing to say.

  11. I too really enjoyed that last stanza…it reminded me of tree shadows intertwining in various shades of grey at dusk…collecting the end of the day… Nicely wordled!

  12. Pamela, I really like that first stanza – those middle two lines are amazing. I want to hear more about destiny and dance!

    Richard

  13. dusk as the lights go down, i much rather the dancing marrow any day….smiles….

  14. Me too, Brian, me too… 🙂

  15. The Flamenco in the marrow, brilliant. And ending at dusk… really great take on the wordle, Pamelita! Hope your Easter was a joy; we also put on a Seder at church this year, I being the ‘token Jew’ in the crowd, ha ha. Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/04/09/billie-holiday/

  16. Love this, Pamela. Dusk finally arriving works so well.

I appreciate all comments.

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