First Rain on Thursday The Sunday Whirl #103/napowrimo #7

In my garden tonight,
crickets sing
grass-laden wetness
to pulse in some stellar dream
hung from sky’s milky dew
in this cool, evening air
held close to me
serene and subdued
by these crickets who sing
in this cool, evening air
in my garden tonight.

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30 responses to “First Rain on Thursday The Sunday Whirl #103/napowrimo #7

  1. J Cosmo Newbery

    I can see it. Now I want to be there…

  2. Very nice poem. I would like a garden to walk in.

  3. I can really relate to the way you define ‘home’.

  4. I always rejoice when nature is in control be in garden or jungle.

  5. Thanks for taking us through your secret garden, Pamela! 🙂

  6. smiles…i rather love the sound of crickets….we will keep the windows open just to hear them…..also like that unity reigns as well in your garden…

  7. Good Sunday morning, Pamela! You wrote the one I wanted to write. Love your use of repetition. Those were difficult words for me to wordle! First week of NaPo 2013 is history. Congratulations to us.

  8. This does sound and read wonderfully harmoniously..

  9. Pamela, this is gorgeous! These words sent me spinning. Without Quickly’s prompt, I was getting nothing. You are a rock star, my friend!

  10. You are too kind, Brenda. I wasn’t thrilled with this, because I felt I wasn’t able to convey my feelings completely. But thanks.

  11. There is a sense of serenity here that you convey to your reader. Wonderful use of the words. I found them difficult until I dropped them in with other prompts. Beautiful, Pamela,

    Elizabeth

    • I didn’t use all of them myself, they were absolutely impossible for me and what I wanted to write about, but I missed last week’s whirl and didn’t want to miss again this week. Thanks, Elizabeth.

  12. Pamelita, I agree, sometimes the Wordle words don’t all fit your vibe. I got them in this week, but it was a about a recording session.

    Your garden is a place I’d love to hang out in, drink some tea, hang. I love crickets; their music sent me off to sleep when I was growing up, and I miss hearing them until late in the season here.

    Oh – did you mean peace “reigns,” or what that an intentional pun? Peace could “rain” as is rain down on everyone who enters. Loved it, loved it. Abrazos, Amelita

    • Amy, I meant as in the rain (lluvia) creating a unity for all. Perhaps I should have worded it differently, using the “reigns”, but that is not what I was trying to say, lol. I had a really difficult time conveying my thoughts with those words, next time I will give up the ship. Thanks.

  13. What a wonderful piece. I kinda miss crickets now on this beautiful spring here

  14. Nice! This has been languishing in my inbox along with two of Richards and one of Elizabeths!

    The only thing my brain wanted to say: does the poem need line 2? It almost takes away from the unity of the poem and it is a lovely little poem, a huggable poem, if that makes sense.

    margo

  15. I agree, Margo. I think I should remove the line. It would read better without it. They were difficult words this time and I only managed 3 of them. Thanks for the suggestions 🙂 I truly appreciate your input.

I appreciate all comments.

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